Always one late to the party, I’ve started reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower. It’s quite good, and 20 or so pages in I saw this little gem of a sentence: “Charlie, we accept the love we think we deserve.” I’ve never read anything so damm true or timely in my life. The more weeks that tick by (its been four) the more I know I have to remember what I deserve.
I know now I didn’t deserve to be someones last option. I didn’t deserve to put up with the constant attention seeking friendships with questionable conversations. I know I deserve a heck of a lot more respect than I got. I deserve to not worry about what bed my boyfriend might be in on any given night. I deserve flowers. I deserve sorrys. I deserve thank yous. I deserve someone who doesn’t think it’s a chore to visit me. I deserve someone capable of an adult relationship. I deserve someone that knows how to communicate with their partner. I deserve someone that knows love can be easy and it can be hard. I deserve someone that is prepared to work hard with me when it’s hard and take it easy when it’s easy. I deserve someone who doesn’t pretend to be something they’re not. I deserve someone who wants to be with me in the same city. I deserve someone who’s not afraid to make a commitment. I deserve someone who doesn’t waste my time. I deserve someone who wants to make me happy. I deserve someone who doesn’t punish me for being me.
I deserve a lot. And I don’t plan on forgetting it again anytime soon. So keep your tricks to yourself boys.